• Most church or civil weddings are conducted after customary liturgies have been concluded.
• At the community level, a marriage is never thought of as complete without meeting customary requirements, regardless of whether a church or civil process has been done.
Nyandarua Governor Francis Kimemia is the latest high profile figure to celebrate an African marriage ceremony. Kimemia wedded his wife Ann in a colourful Kikuyu ritual (ngurario) in Kiamuiru village, Nyeri county, on Saturday, November 2.
In August, Kirinyaga Governor Anne Waiguru married her sweetheart Kamotho Waiganjo in a similar ceremony attended by, among other notable guests, President Uhuru Kenyatta and ODM leader Raila Odinga.
African marriage has recently featured in the news following claims by former Deputy President William Ruto’s chief of staff Marianne Kitany that her estranged husband, Meru Senator Mithika Linturi, married her in a Meru tradition ceremony.
Sarah Wairimu, the widow of murdered Dutch businessman Tob Cohen, has said they married in accordance with Kikuyu customary rites in 2007.
Besides such high profile cases, customary marriage is the norm in Kenya and is fully recognised in law. In fact, many unions can be characterised as mixed marriage since they blend customary and Christian or civil elements.
Most church or civil weddings are conducted after customary liturgies have been concluded. At the community level, a marriage is never thought of as complete without meeting customary requirements, regardless of whether a church or civil process has been done.
Every African community has its marriage norms. But broadly, in all cases the key features are:
One, marriage is understood as a rite of passage to full adulthood. Its defining feature is the production and care of children for continuity of the community.
Two, Africans understand marriage as going far beyond two (or several) individuals in love. It is a union of families – or even communities.
Three, African marriage is a process involving stages, not an incident. At the start, the prospective groom is introduced to the bride’s family by his elders.
Inquiries about his suitability are made. Once the groom is accepted, the next issue is the negotiation of bridewealth. This is not buying the bride.
Rather, it is the cementing of relations through sharing of value. The groom’s side is getting a bride. What does the bride’s family get in return?
Upon delivery of the agreed bridewealth, the marriage ceremony takes place.
Kitany described Linturi being offered by her people mursik (fermented milk) to drink. Meru elders gave her a bundle of miraa shaped as manhood.
Every community has its wedding rituals, reflecting the rich cultural diversity of Kenya.
And finally, African marriage is inclusive and potentially polygamous. Christian, Hindu and civil marriage are exclusive or monogamous. Islamic marriage is potentially polygamous as well.