December, aka DrinkThemba, in my opinion is the fastest-moving month ever. Unlike other months, December is on some serious steroids. In fact, as we count down to Christmas en all we are in the same breath saying goodbye/kwaheri to 2018 altogether.
2019 is less than three weekends away. If you are still struggling with sh*t you did or didn’t do, it’s too late now; 2018 is gone, the bus has already left the station. Now it’s all about celebrating Jesus’ birthday; time to make merry or meet Mary and wait for the New Year.
Let’s call a spade a spade, if you had grand plans for 2018, that dream has died and you need to bury it immediately. It’s time to make new plans and pray to your gods to help you realise them in the New Year.
From next week the whole world will go on recess for the long Christmas holiday, so most hustles will be on pause until after the first weekend of 2019!
One clear sign that 2018 is about
to
pass
its
sell-by
date is the presence of Kenyans from the diaspora. The winter bunnies are already disturbing the city of
Nairobi.
I love the international
diasporans
unlike the local
ones
from Rongai. The international breed of diasporans come with
a vibe
not to mention the forced accents, new clothes, new hairstyles - especially the chics. Plus they come with their life savings.
They party hard non-stop until their savings run out, then they go back to being normal people like their relatives from the
Republic
of Rongai! The accents suddenly
disappear
and all the new outfits, and the fresh hairstyles, start too
parara (fade). The accents
start sounding like that of one of our 'gafanas' as they fade in the clubs, as in, you notice them less.
But the December vibe can’t be a vibe without all
these sideshows
from our relatives and friends who touch down from the diaspora!
ION, December is also a month of loads of events and concerts. The most notable event was the Jameson Connect, which takes place every end of year. The event happened last weekend, with Kenyans getting entertained by a host of big names from all over the world, including
Stephlon
Don and
Desiigner.
Talking of
Desiigner, the star of the Panda hit song, this dude stole the show literally after he decided to leave the comfort of the concert stage, jump on a bouncer's shoulder and ride the bouncer like a horse straight into the regular section. #TheRaverend believes
karma
is a b*tch because I’m very superstitious. To prove me right Desiigner, who decided to use one of his security like a horse, ended up getting his shoes and watch stolen, and his buttocks displayed to the world.
It sounds crazy but the artist was left crying for his shoes and watch on the microphone midway through his performance. His sneakers were recovered and returned to him.
I didn’t manage to attend the event because of the bad weather plus my miraa
(mogox) that night was sweeter than Jameson.
The Raverend
did
a bit
of snooping to find out what kind of sneakers
Desiigner
was wearing and how much they cost. I was very disappointed because he
was
wearing Socks Balenciagas. For sneaker freaks like me, I don’t understand why
Desiigner
had to cry about them sneakers; it’s not like they were LVs or even Jordan’s, they were Balenciagas that look like socks; the ones Cardi B sings about.
In a scale of 1-10, them sneakers are rated 1.0 on the sneakers scale. As a matter of fact, they're not sneakers they are more like loafers/rubbers like Ngomaz. The moment a fan took them off the guy should have just kept
quiet
and gone on with the show!
Anywho, the sneakers
bonoko
were found and were given back to the
artist, so, no harm no foul. My only issue
is, did
Desiigner
at least tip the bouncer who’s job description changed from security to donkey of the show?
Tonight we have another concert, this is a reggae concert in Uhuru Gardens being headlined by Romain Virgo so it’s another reason for Kenyans to party hard. All
The
Raverend
would like to remind all the party-holics is December doesn’t last forever and January is only 15 days away so party responsibly!