Is your friendship toxic? Lets find out

When friendship becomes toxic, it can be salvaged only if the two parties are willing to work together.

In Summary
  • Boundaries are a simple and clear way of letting others know what you are and aren't okay with.
  • Jokes are part of friendships, but when a joke becomes a weapon to put you down then that is not a joke.
For older generations, work was the sole place of connection. Without offices, young people have to get clever about making friends.
For older generations, work was the sole place of connection. Without offices, young people have to get clever about making friends.
Image: BBC

Developing and maintaining healthy friendships involves give-and-take. Sometimes you're the one giving support, and other times you're on the receiving end.

However, Just like food when it goes bad, it can become toxic.

When friendship becomes toxic, it can be salvaged only if the two parties are willing to work together.

It is advisable to differentiate between toxic and flaws. Flaws are part of our human interactions be it with our parents, friends, partners, or ourselves.

Below are some signs that you should look out for to assess if your friendship is toxic.

Your boundaries are not respected

Boundaries are a simple and clear way of letting others know what you are and aren't okay with.

If your friend continually dismisses your boundaries after you have communicated them, then it is time to assess that friendship.

If it has occurred severally, you might need to let them go.

They do not take accountability

If your friend does not take responsibility for how they treat you or how they make you feel, it is time to call it quits.

Especially if they keep disregarding your emotions and feelings rather than apologising, then it is time to have the talk.

They dismiss your values

In friendships, the people involved communicate their values and there is a need to respect that.

However, when your friend dismisses your values and tries to have you compromise them time after time, then you need to reconsider that friendship.

They put you down

Jokes are part of friendships, but when a joke becomes a weapon to put you down then that is not a joke.

Jokes are not based on things that affect your self-esteem and you as a person. If this happens often then let go of that friendship.

Your friend can be toxic and you can also be the toxic friend.

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