• A twist in the tale proves a big blow to chances of escaping the crime
I’m pretty sure I will be discharged within the hour. There’s nothing hospitals are more allergic it to then the words “no insurance.”
I’m feeling good right now. I have my ‘Get out of jail free’ card: A doctor who has diagnosed me for something I do not have, and a hospital that will not refute his diagnosis because I have no insurance. It’s the perfect crime. I have gotten away with it.
Sure enough, an hour later, a lady from the administration block comes to my room, asking how I’ll be paying for my bill. They agree to charge me for a ward bed. An hour after that, the doctor comes back.
“Samantha, all is looking well. However, there are fears you may have a concussion.”
A concussion is a brain injury caused by the brain being shaken around inside the skull after a direct blow to the head. And I had two of those.
“You were unconscious when you arrived here and there is a risk of complications arising, such as bleeding or swelling of the brain in the first 24-48 hours, ” the doctor says.
He goes on to say that they need to keep me overnight at the very minimum.
“Can you afford an overnight stay?” he asks.
I nod. I’d rather go home but I don’t feel great. It’s better they just fix whatever is wrong while I’m here. They come to move me to the general ward. Bye bye, private room. Small price to pay. If this had gone differently, I would have been in a cellblock. My boss walks in as they are rolling my bed out of the room.
“Samantha!” he says. “I just heard. Are you ok?”
I’m so glad to see him, I could cry. People don’t understand how lost one feels in a hospital. Seeing a familiar face is amazing.
“Where are they taking you?” he asks.
The nurse explains that they are moving me to the wards and he immediately rejects it.
“No, no, why?” he asks. “Money? That’s silly! Keep her here, I’m taking care of her whole bill.”
A feeling of trepidation washes over me as they wheel me back into the room. If the doctor hears money is no longer a concern, he may order for the tests that will prove that I don’t have Oromandibular dystonia, and I could very well end up in jail!
I’m not sure what they would charge me with. This has never happened in Kenya to my knowledge. But it’s happened elsewhere.
Back in the 1990s, a lady by the name Lorena Bobbit sliced her husband’s penis off while he slept. He was allegedly abusive towards her and had emotionally and physically abused her over their four-year marriage. The night she cut off his penis, it was alleged that he had raped her. Her testimony was riveting and she clearly feared for her life. She faced up to 20 years in jail for malicious wrongdoing and the whole world, it seems, watched her trial.
It was the battle of the sexes. The men could not believe that a wife could do something like this, in the middle of the night, while he slept. And the women… Well, the women wanted to be able to act to protect themselves in situations where they felt their lives were at risk. In closing arguments, her lawyer said, “…A life is more valuable than a penis.”
On the stand, Lorena had testified that she had no memory of actually cutting off her husband’s penis and only realised what she had done after she had left the apartment and drove away, his penis clutched in her hand.
Edited by T Jalio