Can I get my kidney back?

People go to crazy lengths to show devotion only to get donkey thanks

In Summary

• Doctor never thought a threesome could lead to a divorce



Even as a general practitioner, I get to deal with lots of mental issues affecting my patients. I guess once you’ve seen someone in their birthday suit, they feel they can trust you even more. I don’t have the heart to tell them how I wish the same applied in my dating escapades.

Kigo, a man in his late 40s, has been my patient for more than 10 years now, and he comes to my office for a post-surgery follow-up.

“How are you feeling, Mr Kigo?” I begin.

“As well as any person with only one kidney,” he says.

“You’ll be fine, sir. You only need one healthy kidney. It’s the only organ that comes with a spare. And in your case, you’ll be proud to know your donation was an act of love.”

He shakes his head. “And speaking of love, did I tell you why my friend got divorced?”

“Not that I recall.”

“His wife used to work for a company with many branches across the country, or so she said. She would be sent to these branches on a regular basis, this month to Kisumu, the next to Nakuru and so on. Sometimes for a week or two at a stretch.”

“I can see how such absences can strain a marriage,” I quip.

“Oh, no. My friend was okay with his wife’s travels. But only until he realised she was only going to Mombasa and nowhere else.”

“So, it was the lying that got to him?”

“You can say so. She lied about going to the Coast every month to shoot amateur porn for some Germans.”

I almost drop my stethoscopes. “What?”

“He found a DVD hidden in the house and thought it was a surprise for his birthday, only to watch his wife doing the dirty with two very large German fellas.”

“Wow! That’s brutal, if I may say so. Anyway, your check is complete, Mr Kigo. Everything is working as it should and you’re as healthy as a mule.”

“Thank you, doctor.” He dons his coat and stops at the door. “Did I tell you why I’m getting divorced?”

The second shocker of the day. “I didn’t know you’re getting divorced. You just donated a kidney to your wife.”

“Last week she ran away with her dentist and served me with divorce papers.”

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