It started with Little Mia's mother. She stormed our parents’ WhatsApp group, asking for Susan's mother. When we want to recognise the parent of a specific child, we often ask “who is so-and-so's mother?” The mother replies and the conversation moves private. Our WhatsApp group is basically an information point of summaries from the PTA meetings, not a chatty place.
But last week, things got interesting. Instead of Little Mia's mother waiting for Susan's mother to reply, she went on a full rant about how Susan almost gouged her daughter's eye out. With pictures to boot. The group was eerily quiet. Sort of waiting for the bomb to explode.
This is the thing about parents, we are all very protective of our children. We don't want to hear that our kids were bullied or that they were the bully. All of us want to believe that we raised the perfect little people.
Susan's mother's reply was short and sharp. “This is not the platform to have this conversation!”
While the rest of the issue was resolved between the parties and the teachers at school and Mia's mother being forced to apologise for bringing the matter to the rest of us, my eyes were opened towards the bigger picture.
You see, for most of us in the group, our children are between the ages of three and five years old, too young to be getting into fights or to be involved in cases of bullying. I had started to mentally prepare myself to deal with such issues from primary school, but at kindergarten? I am not ready for this!
Unfortunately for me, I must come to terms with accepting that my son has entered that age group where things get physical. Children of this age are still learning how to deal with emotions and how to express themselves accordingly. Unfortunately for us parents, it does mean that they will go through the phase of venting out their frustrations in a physical manner as they lack the intelligence to deal with their emotions any other way.
This means we have to be ready to teach our children ways of dealing with these new and big emotions they are starting to feel. It means settling cases. It means judgement from other parents as you struggle to teach a three-year-old to get a grip on their emotions while grown adults struggle to control themselves.
The problem with children squabbling amongst themselves is the parents. Parents are quick to assign blame, point fingers and get all worked up over small issues. Meanwhile, the kids forget very quickly and move on as though nothing happened. In the words of Robert Baratheon, “Dammit children, fight. It's over!”
