Mamou is a married woman who seems to need constant reminders of her marital status. She has boyfriends all over the place, sleeps out and of course, constantly lies to her husband. When her husband asks about the men, she says they are her friend’s boyfriends. So now her friend is the prostitute who is trying to break her marriage by ‘spoiling’ her.
By now you know this is one of Franco Luambo Makiadi’s songs. I am a Rumba aficionado. By the way if you are a man who claims to love Rumba, Franco’s music in particular and you think I hate men, go and find out the meanings of most of those songs. Franco and TP OK Jazz sang mostly from a woman's perspective. Basically my articles, in Lingala with melody. (Ha!)
Anyway, the predicament of a divorced woman is as old as time. Somehow the biggest and unforgivable sin a woman can commit is leaving a situation that many times is harmful to her and her offspring. So stubborn is this stain of divorce that it will be used impetuously against her.
There will be an argument in the office. Work-related. Someone will then announce, “no wonder you do not have a husband!” as if having a husband will fix your coworkers stupidity. “So Charles, what you are saying is if I had a husband you would be able to do your job?”
A hundred years from now you will be seated with someone, disagreeing on something, anything and they will say, I know why so and so left you. Do not be stunned, this is the stain that not even the blood of Jesus can make white as snow. I am exaggerating, not 100 years, 20 maybe.
It is worse when you have made up your mind never to return to the marriage. You become a halfway friend for those who have one leg in and another out of the chains of matrimony. “How did you do it ?” they will ask, “You are strong, I am not strong like you”, this is not a compliment. “Please give me the number of a good lawyer!” this stupid call usually comes late in the night or early in the morning.
Really, do not share your contacts. You will be left with egg on your face. A grown-up will figure it out. Then one day you will think to yourself, “hmmm I haven't heard from so and so in a while” and you will check on them to find, 30 friends in common, send a friend request?
In your confusion, you will look at the profile picture because you are sure you were friends just the other day, well a month, two, tops. You will see a picture of the happy couple (your friend and her husband. The one she was to take to the cleaners with your lawyer contact) and maybe some mutual friends smiling like lizards.
Listen, it is good they got back together. Contrary to popular belief, it is not fun out here. The animals are wild and the jungle is thick. So like the angels, we rejoice when a soul is able to find their way home or to their husband. We are even more glad for the children who will have both their parents. It is so unnecessary to be treated like the evil witch who if invited or even told about the celebration will cast a spell on everyone and send them to a deep slumber.
The next time you look at a divorced woman and feel like hitting below the belt, (how come divorced men do not go through this? In fact they are often envied by their gender) just remember, no woman really goes into a marriage with the sole purpose of getting divorced, it is the same way you cannot choose your relatives. You go into a marriage thinking he is human, because no devil will present to you in courtship, and you find yourself in hell. You do what anyone would do, you flee. Life happens.
Meanwhile, there are men who are bored, idle, drunk or all of the above who think everyone is in the same boat. They call you via messenger usually try to video call you. To them I ask, What can I do differently so you do not think I am the one, or two?
