Why older women like eggplant

So let us get a few things straight. I do not hate men. I interact with all manner of men. Good ones. Bad ones. Demons. Reptiles. Just because I write about them, does not mean I hate a whole group of people. In fact, hate is such a heavy word. It implies that I care. I care about a few but I do not have the capacity to care for all men enough to hate all of them.

That being said, I think of myself as a storyteller. I just report what I see in my words. I am sorry the truth offends many of you. Maybe try behaving better so that my stories favour you.

Now that we have that out of the way, women, this dating younger, way younger, men (often broke) just does not make any cents (If you know you know) to me. This dickmatisation story came from where yawa?

The other day someone was talking about a woman who had kicked out her daughter because the younger man she was playing house with had taken a liking to her daughter. It did not matter that her daughter did not encourage daddy wannabe. No evidence would get her to see the obvious. The one telling the story was convinced the woman had been dickmatised.

You know such stories are not unique. Another person at the table had her own horror story of a woman who had been hypnotised by the dangling bits of a man. Said woman had inherited millions in cash as well as a house or two. The woman lost it all in less than five years. Nothing left for her children. It was said that the man is doing well though. Married an agemate and I guess tried to forget his past.

As we were sitting in silence, trying to digest these horror stories and trying to rub away goosebumps from our arms, a mature lady walks in. She is dressed well, yani, she looks like money. In tow is a hooligan in big shorts, a baseball shirt, those spaceship-looking sneakers and an earring. Those nineties reject men type. He even has a stupid accent and waves his arms all over the place like a drunk octopus when he talks. His madam is also trying to keep up, nodding her head at nothing and keeps asking if people know what she is saying.

As madam is busy trying to stay awake, hip-hop octopus has just got a number from a yengs at the corner. We all know how that will end, he will be busted and madam will not understand how the affair went on for that long under her nose.

I am told these younger men have fire in their loins. They are good for chapatti-cooking type sessions. Turn the chapati, apply oil vigorously with a steady spoon. Turn and repeat and then throw off the pan. I would really like to know what type of supplements some women are on. I am 40, and if I get down to Maddtraxx ‘eh get down eh get down’, tomorrow I will need help getting up.

I totally get the many women who do not like the job of begging and jump-starting apparatus, but there are older men who can still start the engine on the first try and offer a steady enjoyable ride. Maybe dating the older ones will save children and women some grief? Granted, there are bad people out there no matter their age, but maybe an older man might respect his age and not start chasing your daughter. Your daughter too may not look at him as ‘potential’.

We also want to assume the older man has made something of himself and will not be coming to the union to fleece you. I know. Just do your background search my sisters.

Also my sisters, age-appropriate men are good for your bones on and off the dance floor. I just cannot believe that a grown woman would act out of character because of a reproductive organ. I would rather believe in the power of witchcraft.

When all is said and done (pun), unto each their own.

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