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MWANGI: Women deserve to live without fear of being stabbed, drugged, killed or shot

It is absolutely disgusting to reduce survivors of sexual and gender-based violence to mockery.

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by Josephine Mayuya

Opinion25 January 2024 - 09:15
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In Summary


  • Women should not live in a survival mode every day in fear that someone will kill them, attack them, harass them, or touch them.
  • Why are we blaming women? Aren’t we supposed to ensure that systems can protect everyone?
Gender-based violence victim

Women do not get raped because they were drinking or taking drugs. Women do not get raped because they were not careful enough or were walking at night in dresses and skirts. Women get raped because someone raped them.

Women and girls continue to face life-threatening situations in their daily social, educational, economic and personal lives from acts of violence. Most of the time the perpetrator is known to them.

According to Amnesty Kenya, 108 Kenyan women were killed in 2019, while 40 per cent of women in Kenya experience domestic violence in their lifetime.

According to the Kenya Demographic and Health Survey 2014, 14 per cent of women and six per cent of men aged 15-49 reported having experienced sexual violence at least once in their lifetime.

The government has made several laws and policies and regulations to prevent and control forms of violence against women and children, including the Bill of Rights within the Constitution of Kenya (2010) and the Sexual Offences Act (2006). among others.

The Constitution, in article 27 (1), states that, "Every person is equal before the law and has the right to equal protection and equal benefit of the law."

In recent weeks, Kenya has witnessed an increase in cases of gender-based violence against children and women; in some of these cases lives have been lost.

We have an opportunity to make a difference for the better. Every one of us has a role to play. According to the Ministry of Health, between mid-March and June 2020, 5,000 rape cases were reported, a seven per cent increase from the same period in 2019. Some 70 per cent of victims were girls aged 18 and below, five per cent were boys and men, while 95 per cent of the perpetrators were men.

Rape culture is a social environment that allows sexual violence to be normalised and justified, fuelled by persistent gender inequalities and attitudes about gender and sexuality.

Women do not get raped because they were drinking or taking drugs. Women do not get raped because they were not careful enough or were walking at night in dresses and skirts. Women get raped because someone raped them.


Questions and statements that would make one a rape apologist include; Where is the proof, why didn’t you call the police then, that doesn’t count as assault, he is not normally like that, why were you drinking too much, move on that was long ago, well you should not have gone to that party, you are overreacting.

Just stop victim-blaming women and girls who experience sexual and gender-based violence. Perpetrators should be jailed to serve as an example to anyone who might want to violate anyone sexually.

Women should not live in a survival mode every day in fear that someone will kill them, attack them, harass them, or touch them. This is not a feminist agenda; these cases are happening and they need to stop.

Women are dying at the hands of men. It is absolutely disgusting to reduce survivors of sexual and gender-based violence to mockery. Women should live free from violence of any nature and form.

Why are we blaming women? Aren’t we supposed to ensure that systems can protect everyone? Ensure that cultural and religious beliefs and views do not discriminate against anyone. Ensure that perpetrators are brought to book.

Telling women to be safe needs to end, safe from what? Safe from who? Families and community systems have encouraged girls and women to live in fear. This should and must stop. Statements like 'you know you’re a girl, you're not supposed to go out at night, you're not supposed to wear something short, don’t be too beautiful or don't put on makeup' are rubbish.

The discussions need to change to 'Arrest perpetrators, develop county laws and guidelines with systems and structures that protect everyone; have safe houses for survivors of sexual and gender-based violence.' We should not continue to instil fear or be rape apologists.

What post-traumatic experiences do these girls and women go through after these acts of violence, and statements from their own families and communities? What are some of the societal aspects of stigma and discrimination that survivors go through?

Say no to victim blaming; shaming women; femicide; sexual and gender-based violence; rape; defilement; sexual assault; catcalling; hate; discriminatory and misogynistic comments targeting survivors of SGBV; normalizing violence; repeat offenders. End violence against women. Stop killing women.

Youth activist. @alvinmwangi254


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