- These days, women are thinking twice before they take their husbands name
- In the past, there was little to question because it was almost customary
Image: SHUTTERSTOCK
For the longest time, it has been commonplace to see couples sharing their last name.
It was almost customary that a wife, upon marriage, takes the last name of her husband.
This showed that she had left her family and gone to form her own family with her husband.
But as the years have gone by, especially coming into the 21st Century, people have begun to adopt modern ways.
This has led to many questioning the old ways of doing things and making changes to traditions where they see fit.
One area that has changed is the marriage front, especially the question of last names.
I asked a few women and men whether it was important that a married couple have the same surname as Mr and Mrs X.
It turned out that 'modern' women are now thinking twice before they take up their husbands' surnames.
Anita(not her real name), 26, said that she would not take up her husband's last name if it did not sound right.
"My surname has a better ring to it. I can't imagine having to change my last name only to get a new one that doesn't sound very well," she said.
Jane*,25, said that such things as taking her husband's name are outdated and she would rather keep her father's name.
"It does not mean that I don't love my husband if I don't take his name. Love is not measured by names. Besides, people will already know that I am married to him, a name will not change that," she said.
Alice*, 28, said that if it was a big deal to her husband that she takes up his name, she would do it.
"But if it doesn't bother him then I won't bother with it either. I would change it only if he said he wanted me to," she said.
The men were more likely to say that they wanted their wives to have their names.
Kamau*, 24, said that it was not to show that he possessed or owned his wife.
"It is a sign of love and commitment to each other and the marriage. It just means that she has now left her family and she is now going to be part of a new family with her husband," he said.
Jeremiah*, 29, said that taking up a husband's name is part of a wife's duty to submit and commit to them.
"I don't know if it's in the Bible but it does say that a wife should submit to their husband. Our parents did it. Our mothers took up our fathers' names. It is just how it has always been done," he said.
Zachary* agreed with Jeremiah saying that it is the way things have always been.
"This new trend of forgoing your husband's name, I think it is just women influencing each other. But remember, you won't be in a marriage with your friends," he said.
To go around this contentious issue, many women have been using clever tactics once they get married.
One common way is by putting a hyphen between their surname and their husband's.
That way, both of them can win and no party is aggrieved.
Others have been lucky to find that they share the same last name with their partner and thus, no one needs to change their name at all.
However, at the end of the day, all that matters is what works for the married couple because it is their marriage after all and only they themselves know what is good for their union.