Skimpily-dressed damsels excite lakeside city during funeral

AS KISUMU RECEIVED thousands of leaders mourning a prominent national figure, a parallel scene unfolded in the city's vibrant nightlife. A noticeable influx of daringly dressed non-local damsels were observed gracefully moving between high-end hotels. Their reported mission was to scout for the high-profile guests who had flocked the lakeside city for the historic funeral. According to local attendants, the visitors made a significant financial killing over the three nights, turning their nocturnal ventures into the city's worst-kept secret and a stark contrast to the day's somber official events.

*** STILL ON THE FUNERAL, a specific group of politicians from a politically charged region has become the subject of intense public criticism for their conspicuous no-show as donations poured in. Keen observers were overheard mocking the individuals, noting they are usually only keen on "photo opportunities, but arrived with empty hands." The group was unfavourably compared to political leaders from other regions whose tangible contributions and presence were deeply felt and well-documented. Social media platforms are now awash with questions demanding an explanation for their poor showing, with many speculating that the perceived penny pinchers are comfortable knowing a more powerful patron came to their rescue.

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