She had everything to live for.
Yet student doctor Lydia Wahura Kanyoro, 35, and in the prime of life, killed herself on Saturday by injecting herself with anaesthetic drugs in the KNH parking lot.
“I am so so so so sorry but I don’t expect forgiveness. I am scared of dying but I am more scared of living,” a printed note read.
She said it was "hard to live in a skin that is not mine and life was not what I expected".
Her colleagues described her as a brilliant professional and a top-performing student with a limitless future.
Police are analysing the apparent suicide note to determine if indeed she wrote it and said it seemed to be written in parables. They declined to disclose further contents, saying it was crucial evidence.
They did say the note was printed from an email dated June 12 at 9am.
A postmortem exam was to be performed on Tuesday.
Lydia, a star medical student in paediatrics, was pursuing her master's degree in medicine at UoN's College of Health Sciences at Kenyatta National Hospital.
Her body was found at 1pm in the back seat of her car with two vials of labelled drugs and three syringes.
What drove her to end her life? That's the question consuming relatives, colleagues and friends.
And her death raises the spectre of psychological pressure and untreated mental health issues among medical professionals, especially younger health workers.
Witnesses said they saw Lydia on June 12 checking into the lecture hall at about 9am when she registered for her classes.
At about 9.30am, she was seen leaving and heading to her car where she ended her life.
Detectives attached to the Kilimani division and her fellow medical practitioners are determined to establish what drove her to end her life.
Police said she had called some relatives, telling them where she was and what she planned to do.
The head of security at the School of Medicine, George Onyango, said he spotted the body in the back seat of her sedan in the hospital parking lot at 1pm.
Kilimani police boss Andrew Muturi said the drugs were sent to the Government Chemist for analysis.
He said they had not yet established the motive for the suicide but would talk to family, friends, colleagues and others.
“We are also in possession of a printed suicide note believed to have been authored by the deceased ,which will also be subjected to analysis to establish if it was indeed, among other things, written by the deceased,” Muturi said.
Depression is on the rise in the medical field particularly since the Covid-19 pandemic struck.
Many medical staff are also suffering depression and other mental conditions attributed to stress and burnout.
Experts say the majority are trainee doctors suffering from serious mental health issues that if not addressed are a ticking time bomb.
(Edited by V. Graham)
