• Court drama
Image: FILE
A brave Nairobi magistrate fled 'for safety' after learning a journalist was going to cover a story in her courtroom.
It is not known why she swiftly left but a court clerk said she believed the journalist would infect her with coronavirus.
“Madam saizi anaogopa wanahabari sana, si unaona vile wanazurura zurura, wanaeza mletea corona,” he said. This loosly translates to "Madama fears journalists as they may infect her with coronavirus. They move from one place to another, even in Mbagathi."
The journalist arrived and found the courtroom empty.
Just 0.5 hot
As coronavirus continues to disrupt life, a Nairobi court was treated to drama when a police officer told a court official that her colleague is "0.5 hot".
“Just look at her, she is 0.5 hot, big buttocks, big head and chest but no appealing face, I think it's because of coronavirus," she told an idling court official.
Hard times for food vendors.
A food vendor is wondering about the absence of clients, afraid or working from home because of coronavirus.
“If I knew earlier, I would have saved money corona is very bad actually, even Eddu is not around,” she said.
A female court official asked a colleague to help her get a short, strong man.
“I am single and my age is running very fast. I don't have a kid and I don’t want coronavirus to kill me before a short strong man helps me get one," she told a colleague called Linet.
Just chat one up, she was told.
“Just get a hot one, chat him up, he is always available, these men are always avalable. They are ready for a beautiful woman like you,” her friend told her.
Corona empties courts, brings joy to suspects
As Covid-19 fears pervade, most suspects are getting an early Christmas.
“Coronavirus will make them spare us, they have no option. Or let them jail us so we go with our virus," a suspect was overheard saying at a Nairobi court.