INSENSITIVE SOCIETY

I still hurt from stigma over baby delay

She waited seven years after marriage to get a child

In Summary

• She had a rough time dealing with intrusive comments, including being called barren

Gospel artist Kambua Mathu
Gospel artist Kambua Mathu
Image: Kambua instagram

Gospel singer Kambua says stigma was the hardest thing she had to deal with while waiting to get a baby.

Kambua got married to her husband in 2012 and was blessed with a son, Nate, in 2019.

Speaking on YouTube episode 'Waiting Womb Trust', she said she has still not overcome the stigma.

 
 

"Not having control of what people said about me and being in a society that is very insensitive and very intrusive was very tough for me," she said.

 

"My uterus is not anybody's business, but people make it their business to decide when you should have kids and all of that."

Kambua recounted her journey, saying she was called all sorts of names, including barren.

"All the nastiest of things were said. Some said my husband is old, while others said I was not interested in having children because of my career."

Others advised her to visit a woman who opens people's wombs through prayers in Huruma.

"I remember going to a shopping mall and I am minding my business, and an older lady approached me and she started by, 'Kambua, I love your music', and I thought, 'Ooh, thank you'," she said.

"She pulled me to a corner and told me, 'Kambua there is a woman in Huruma who prays for women and any barren woman who goes in there, goes back to give thanks for the baby they receive.'"

 
 

Kambua says it was so uncomfortable as she didn't know who the woman was and the woman did not know what Kambua was going through.

 

"It sounded to me like witchcraft," she said.

Another woman asked her, "Na kwa nini unakataa kupata watoto?"

"I asked her, 'Who is the giver of children? Why would you ask me that? It is none of your business whether I have children or not.' After the show, she looked for me and apologised and said, 'Sitakua nauliza mtu hivo'."

Kambua says even though she finally welcomed her child, she has not gotten over the nasty words that were said about her.

"My son Nate is here and he reminds me every day of the goodness of God, but I still have aloneness on things that were said to me in my waiting journey, and there are battles I fight every day," she said.

"That stigma made me shy away from certain spaces and I have had to ask God to give me a voice in certain spaces."