• The best way to ask for it is indirectly. That's where Sheng comes in
Sex is one of the basic needs for every couple that needs to be fulfilled to keep a relationship going. However, let us also not ignore the fact that even the youths are engaging in early sex today.
In addition to the full-time job of keeping the relationship going, keeping the sex going can be like a second job. What kind of job, depends on how good you’ve got it.
But there is still some kind of work if you have either mismatched libidos due to desire issues, or bad timing due to life issues. One person wants to do it more than the other person, so the person who wants to do it more has to ask for it and initiate it, and that gets old, and then people get irritable with each other.
Alternatively, both people want to do it, they just get tired or busy or don’t want to do it at the same time, and then they realise they are very irritable with each other. Sometimes, someone has to initiate it. Typically, that is the men. Ladies, do you get stuck in the kind of weird ways your men ask for it? I know you do. You keep on assuming you don't understand what he is asking for.
I asked a few of my youth friends who are in relationships how they would ask for sex without sounding needy or asking directly. Most of them said, currently the best way to say it is going indirectly. “The best play is to just make a move, not say, ‘Can we have sex?' Ask if 'inaweza'. Sheng is the thing.
I decided to get the Sheng' words the youths are using. Check out the list. Some will go indirect and ask, 'Uko home nikam?' 'Nataka therapy.' 'Zinadai mbaya.' 'Twende Pekejeng.' 'Kunyanduana.' 'Kulambana lolo.'
Another friend came and joined the conversation and said for him, if the person they are asking for sex from is their spouse, they will go direct. Kama ni Mpango, ama Team Tangatanga, lazima ukue mjanjez, I mean you have to request with requests like, 'Kam tupike supper.'
Other Sheng words for sex include, 'Mkunaji, kae, kusoma katiba, piga miti, Mombasa raha.'
Just so you know, the best sex is the enthusiastic fun kind that happens naturally. Now you know how you get your lady to want to sleep with you without ruining the fun that sex demands.