This quarter life shebang looks so foreign in an African home

This quarter-life crisis thing is dealing with me proper.

I can also confidently say it is also having a field day with my close friends.

Wikipedia defines it as a crisis "involving anxiety over the direction and quality of one's life", which is most commonly experienced in a period ranging from a person's early 20s up to their mid-30s.

I would like to think that during our parents’ era, life was very different.

Judging from the kind of stories my seniors have shared with me, it is evident life was antithetic.

I was listening to a Kenyan podcast episode and the co-hosts talked of how our “babybooming” parents are so shocked that we don’t want children at an early age.

Forget early age, there are some of us who don’t want children at all.

I remember there I was a time when I told you all of how my uncle tried to corner me with the “when are you getting married” question immediately after my graduation.

I wasn’t even out of my honeymoon phase.

I remember there was a time when an acquaintance in the office, probably in their 50s or 60s, told me of how they met their significant other and had a baby almost immediately after campus.

I doubted if quarter-life crisis affected them at all because judging from the way they were talking, they sort of had things figured out.

On the other hand, they sounded like they didn’t know what they were doing with life.

Our African parents, with all honesty, would have handled marriage and raising kids in their 20s better than we can today.

I don't think they understand what this quarter-life shebang is all about.

I also don’t know why most are shocked and taken aback that we do not want to engage in such talks, especially at a time when this crisis is beating us up proper.

All around me, everyone is like, who is going to sustain a child in this economy?

“Mel, I can’t even take care of a cat, what of a whole human? Forget one, what of two human beings?”

I think many people around me are going through ‘a period of insecurity, doubt and disappointment surrounding their career, relationships and financial situations’.

I also do have young mums and dads in my space, and I respect that they embraced that stage in their life.

But I also know that they have their fair share of quarter life crisis.

I believe most of us are in that era where we don’t know where our lives are headed.

Nothing makes sense. It’s just good vibes and inshallah.

Freestyling life as it comes but low-key the kind of crisis we are in is just crazy.

I don’t know if I qualify to call it the African way of life, but the whole African idea where we complete campus, have life figured out, ready to settle down with an arranged partner or chosen one is an era that is done and dusted with.

I think our parents should be comfortable with the fact that when we want to do it, we will actually do it.

I relate to anyone who is confused about the different relationships they are in, navigating jobs to make sense out of their chosen career path, and concerned about their financial situation.

I relate to anyone who has questions that are never-ending simply because they don’t have answers.

If you are going through any kind of crisis, especially this quarter-life one, embrace the process. Pause, take time to figure things out, but ultimately remember that times are completely different.

Don't feel too pressured to do anything.

Quarter-life crisis might look so foreign in your home, but it is an actual crisis.