The last date I’ll ever go on

My days of being wild and free are over after meeting a church girl

In Summary

• The Lord’s word is supreme. When he says yes, no one can say no, bachelor learns

A religious couple
A religious couple


Something about church women makes my heart gallop. Perhaps it’s their long dresses pressed to a million pleats, or the white headscarves they usually have on. The whole ensemble speaks of a holy life without the encumbrances of the regular modern woman.

I’m not all that naïve, though. I’ve seen some pretty interesting footage of some of these women of God, but that doesn’t remove much from the entire illusion.

So, when I visit my mother, and she introduces me to a beautiful church girl, I figure, what will it hurt to go on one date?

We end up at a small hotel, where I order nyama choma.

She prefers vegetarian fare. ‘I hate the thought of eating something that was once alive.’

‘Fair point.’ I decide to address the elephant in the room. ‘Let me ask, if we ended up together, would it be necessary for me to join the church?’

‘You don’t have to, but it would be nice for our children. The man is the head of the home. He should set a good example for the little ones to follow.’

‘Okay. Would we be allowed to eat meat?’

She laughs so beautifully. ‘Of course, you can. Being a vegetarian is my choice. Nothing to do with church.’

‘Phew! Good to know. So how does the whole dating thing go with people of the church?’

‘We don’t go on dates.’

I almost choke on my steak. ‘Excuse me?’

‘The Lord shows us who we shall marry and we follow his words.’

‘But we’re on a date, right now, aren’t we?’

She laughs again. And again, she does it so beautifully. ‘This isn’t a date. Didn’t your mother tell you? We came here so I can inform you of the Lord’s will.’

‘Which is…’

‘He revealed to me in a dream that you are meant to be my husband, and I your wife.’

I swallow hard. ‘Just like that?’

‘The Lord’s word is supreme. And when he says yes, no one can say no.’

‘But we should go out on more dates, get to know each other better if we’re to spend the rest of our lives together. Don’t you think?’

‘My future husband,’ she says, a coy smile on her face, ‘I’m afraid this is the last date you’ll ever be on.’

I’m no longer sure how I feel about church girls.

Settling Down

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