In Kenya, people often talk about ‘family values’ to support traditional family structures.
But if we look closer, we see a sad reality: many women suffer violence in their own homes.
Instead of being a safe place, home becomes a prison of fear, control and abuse for countless women.
Family violence is often hidden.
It’s treated as a private matter, so society doesn’t see it.
When it does come to light, people usually suggest solving it within the family, which keeps victims silent.
This deep rooted belief puts ‘family values’ above the safety and well-being of its members.
Women, under immense pressure to keep up appearances, endure terrible abuse in silence.
They fear being shunned by society or facing even more violence.
Some even lose their lives.
Talking about ‘family values’ can sometimes hide the problem and let abusers avoid responsibility.
Treating family issues as private matters creates an environment where violence becomes normal and accepted.
The emotional and physical wounds can last a lifetime, causing many women to suffer in silence.
They may believe they have to endure the pain to keep the family together.
Sometimes, religious institutions make this worse by promoting traditional gender roles that discourage women from speaking out or seeking help.
This keeps them trapped in cycles of abuse.
Recently, Kenya has seen a troubling rise in femicide—the killing of women because they are women.
A report from the National Police Service showed that 97 women were killed in the last three months.
That’s one woman losing her life every day.
Many of these victims were harmed by their intimate partners.
According to the Kenya Demographic and Health Survey (2022), 34 per cent of women have faced physical violence since the age of 15, with 16 per cent experiencing it recently.
The rate of violence increases with age: 20 per cent of women aged 15–19 report such experiences, rising to 42 per cent among women aged 45–49.
Married women are more likely to face violence (41 per cent) compared to unmarried women (20 per cent).
These numbers are not just statistics; they represent deep personal tragedies affecting families for generations.
We urgently need to rethink what we mean by ‘family values’.
Protecting all family members, especially women and children, should be based on justice, respect and support.
These principles match the core values of human dignity and equality in the Kenyan Constitution, especially Articles 27 and 28, which call for equality and respect for human dignity.
To make real change, we must break down the idea that family violence is a private matter and challenge the belief that violence against women is acceptable.
Community involvement is crucial to change perceptions and stop the silent acceptance that often surrounds this issue.
Initiatives that encourage open discussions about family violence can empower victims to speak up and seek help.
As a society, we must create a new understanding of ‘family values’ that puts the safety and well-being of all members first.
By giving a voice to those who have been silenced and facing the harsh realities of family violence directly, we can remove the barriers that have allowed such abuse to continue.
As we observe the 16 Days of Activism, we hope the campaign will support initiatives that truly help victims of family violence.
Author is a communications consultant
