I think I have told you guys this before. My father always said you cannot just tell people you cannot get someone. How? Do you mean you cannot even talk to the guy at the kiosk or wherever to be with you? My mother added, on a different occasion, that there would always be men at whatever stage in my life. Tall, short, thin, round, green or blue, young and old.
The other day someone said to me that I cannot compete with a 25-year-old and so I had to behave a little better towards men. I was so amused. Mostly that that was the sole reason I should behave.
Better. I remembered another thing my mother said: “You see these madwomen at the market, they give birth, do not think they are impregnated by their fellow madmen.” (Ladies, read this again and understand)
So society has placed expiration dates on women so that they can be arm-twisted into accepting half-ass things. Half-ass men, with half-ass ambitions going nowhere fast. Why? You are getting past your use-by date. Half ass is better than no ass. Apparently.
The argument has always been that quality men can have their pick. (Because we are all mangoes in the market). The quality men apparently like taut mangoes. Not juicy, loosey, squishy ones. So according to this man, we should not wait for the man to pick us, just the fact that he has looked our way and we are in competition with taut mangoes, we should jump into the basket and do whatever is in our power to stay in this imaginary race.
I have been young before. Believe it or not. I did not know a quality man from a perverted old fart. Looking back now, I realise that any old man who approached me or my friends as girls was not doing so because we had a lot to offer the relationship.
He approached us because he probably thought we were easy to manipulate, we did not cost much to entertain and mostly, he was a deviant. Because what does a 40-year-old have in common with a 20-year-old yawa? And do not tell us about some people being mature for their age. Even if they are, is the reward this? To have their youth wasted by selfish older men?
I cannot be in competition with my daughter. I am an African woman, girls young enough to be my children are my daughters. I teach my daughters. Luckily for me, I was taught by my own mother, so while I did not waste my youth with old fogies, I wasted it with an age mate. Which is not too bad considering I was able to get my children.
Anyway so I am saying this, neither the 25-year-old nor the 43-year-old needs to be with an undercover paedophile. There is nothing quality about him.
Yes, old people marry young people. But these ones who are being called “quality” are either in a perpetual state of adolescence or just want to waste a girl’s time while he distracts himself from whatever is going on in his house. Then one day, he will find the Lord, develop arthritis and retire to be a doting grandfather.
So kindly, whom it may concern, kill that ageism story. We are not here for it.
In conclusion, let us agree. Men are the easiest things to get. And so are women. No one should be harassing you with your age, your size, your colour or your anything yawa.
Otherwise, I hope your year has started well. Be careful to be thankful. As a people we love to complain. Someone said last year was horrible to them. So I asked what exactly happened. “Horrible things!" Did you get Covid? Did you lose your job? Are your people well?
"No, No, Yes." Did you eat? Granted, not what you always wanted, but you did not go to bed hungry. You are not homeless, maybe struggled with rent for a few months but no one evicted you. So maybe life just happened. And it will happen again this year. And the next.
