Leave me and my vagina alone

Imagine if you will two fruits an orange and a grapefruit. Both are citrus fruits. Both will provide you with Vitamin C. An orange is Sh10 and grapefruit is Sh50 (for argument sake). You need vitamin C, so as a responsible adult you decide to include fruit in your diet. You go to the market but alas, you only have Sh15.

You ask if you can pay Sh15 for the grapefruit. You probably have never had grapefruit and maybe you have only seen it on some diet article or watched an actress eat one on the telly. You are told you absolutely cannot pay Sh15. You still need vitamin C, there is an orange and it is within your price range. You buy the orange and go home. Makes sense, yes?

But now consider Person B. Goes to the market with Sh5. He wants a grapefruit and is told, “Not with Sh5! Apana leta mchezo kwa kazi!” He haggles and is told for his Sh5 he can get a small orange. “Boss, ni juu umeteta sana!”

Person B takes the small orange because he needs vitamin C. Instead of being grateful, he begins to speak ill of grapefruits. To make it worse, the small oranges join him. The small oranges say, “Look at grapefruit, why does it think it’s better than us? We all have vitamin C and potassium and what not. We are all citrus fruits, why should it be more expensive? Besides, it’s not even sweet!”

Person C comes to the market and buys a grapefruit. Does not bargain, does not complain. He knows both are citrus fruits, he knows both are good sources of vitamin C. He wants a grapefruit, he can afford it, he buys it. Person B starts abusing Person C. The small oranges join him in the abuse. They also abuse the grapefruit more. Grapefruit never responds. Not even to tell the small oranges they could become grapefruits if they crossed with pomelos (Google).

Person D goes to the market sees both fruits, he can buy two big oranges, but cannot afford one grapefruit. He decides to go look for more money, then comes back to buy a grapefruit. As you can imagine, Person B is furious.

“Why are you wasting YOUR money?” Of course, the small oranges join in giving unsolicited advice. “We all have a thick rind and pulpy flesh, why pay more for grapefruit?” Ridiculous right? No one asked them, no one is using anything that belongs to them but they are mad as hell.

Moral of the story: Leave women and the men who want them alone. Be content with what you can manage.

Here is the thing about saying harmful things that we think are funny. One day someone said black people are monkeys and I am sure they thought it was funny and people told it to each other until they believed it. Then it did not feel so bad killing a monkey, here we are today. Human atrocities start this way. By dehumanising a person.

This is why I am very worried about the vagina being referred to as mere muscles and mucus. It will be said until we believe it. As if a vagina can exist without a woman’s body and soul. Whatever enters a vagina, enters all parts of the woman.

Trying to refer to it as an inconsequential thing strips a woman of her humanity, her femininity and that is irresponsible. Be careful not to give rise to a monster that will take us generations to kill.

All the hullabaloo because society wants to police women’s choices and bodies. I just cannot understand this fascination with the vagina by society. You share it with multiple people, you are loose. You decide not to, it is because no one wants you. You decide to only share with people you feel are worthy of it, you think you are better than others. You put a price on it, you are a prostitute.

You grow older (as if ageing is unique to women), it is because you never shared with unworthy people, because you thought you were better, so now everyone thinks it has stopped working and you must be bitter. We really need to get into the habit of using our brains. (Is it a muscle with mucus?)

A woman should do what she wants with her vagina. I hope she always chooses to do what brings her pleasure, whatever form that may take. 

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