What really is the problem with some men? Take this one for example. Grown (we are sure because of the body size). Went to school. Works for a company that sells milk (and not as a clerk). But cannot be bothered to pay fees or buy his children food unless threatened by lawyers. Even sending his children some of that milk he sells? His children by the way, not the neighbour’s children, is a big ask. Then you want to call me a man hater. How can such be talked of kindly?
Anyway, so this past week, we have been in the public court. Our sisters from Central as respondents with those of us from the lake as co-respondents. Our charge? Killing men. In cold blood or slowly leading them to their death.
It was all fun and games until I started noticing an undertone that did not feel right. A hatred. One that stems from insecurity, hurt (real or conditioned) and religion. Or hypocrisy. When you think about it, where did apartheid, slavery, racism come from? Even xenophobia?
So for me, a bell went off when I saw a WhatsApp status update from a man, whom I have since ‘unfriended’ in real life, but not before asking him a thing or two. His status said, “We live in a time where women have the hearts of Satan.”
When I asked why he would make such a careless statement, this unfortunate soul or maybe sole is better, says to me that he knew I would “tetea (defend)” women; that this is a real thing, even State House knows. Ok, I know. I really should do better with the choice of people I occasionally talk to. It is just that the signs are not usually on their foreheads. It usually takes an isolated incident to bring out who people really are.
In as much as we are appalled, and we should be, by the incident that has been all over media, it is necessary to carefully evaluate most of the things we say concerning the case. We cannot now demonise a whole tribe of women because of the doing, or not (she has not had her day in court yet), of one woman. In times like this, it is easy to plant hate and dehumanise women. It can be funny now, until it is not.
Nobody just wakes up hating a group of people, it takes years of the wrong narrative. Women have been killed for 'being’ witches and prostitutes. Someone had to dehumanise women thought to be those things first so that killing of women was not a sin or a crime. Religion usually plays a big part. When thought of as unclean, or as a Jezebel or Eve as a trickster who made Adam eat the apple and now we are all suffering in this world instead of enjoying ourselves in that utopian garden, Eden.
We have just ‘recovered’ from being burnt because we were supposedly witches and being stoned to death because we slept with men (prostitutes). I think we are now more exposed, we should not allow this to degenerate because a few rotten potatoes think women are killers or are Satan. People kill, not just women and Satan is a man with horns, a tail and goat legs (said in jest, do not knot your underwear).
Let us have intelligent and responsible banter. I am not claiming anyone is innocent or guilty. That is the court’s place. I am charged VAT among other taxes, and I am hoping my money is being spent well.
On behalf of my fellow sisters from the lake, we have been charged with frustrating, harassing (read: not accepting mediocrity ) our men until they supposedly jump into septic tanks. I would like to strongly refute this rancorous claim and condemn the author of that imprudent statement. I have not heard of any such man.
But, if it is because they cannot find septic tanks, I promise to commission the creation of an app that will show the nearest septic tanks to those who cannot stand the heat we bring. We may also need to improve on the harassment, sorry the heat, so that the next time the accusations are founded on evidence, not dysphoria.
