• Trauma is felt immediately after a dangerous event.
• But sometimes, children were victims of these events at an early age, the symptoms portray behaviours in adulthood that reflect on what happened.
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Child trauma refers to a scary, dangerous or life threatening event that happens to a child.
When faced with trauma, the child may become overwhelmed, upset or helpless.
Trauma is felt immediately after a dangerous event. But sometimes, children were victims of these events at an early age where they could not understand the symptoms portray behaviours in adulthood that reflect on what happened.
Depending on their personality, different children will portray signs of trauma differently.
One child may completely withdraw to avoid ‘provoking’ the perpetrator or worsen the situation, while another could become overly social to try to win over their perpetrator.
Causes of children trauma include physical, sexual or emotional abuses, neglect, parent separation, household violence and mental illness of a family member, etc.
At a young age, it is possible to pick if a child is undergoing an adverse stress from their daily activities and behaviours. Parents or guardians need to be very observant and engaging to find out if their child is reacting to a dangerous situation.
For instance, a child hitting their dolls when playing could be undergoing physical abuse or effects of watching a household member abused physically. If they regularly touch other children inappropriately or using words that have a sexual connotation, they could be undergoing sexual abuse.
There are many signs to watch out for if a child is undergoing a traumatic experience. A child could withdraw socially.
At the age below 12 years, a child’s personality is developing and it is shaped by his or her environment and experiences.
A child who was abused at a young age upon comprehending the abuse could become withdrawn, have low self worth and very shy, if they begin questioning why they were picked out for that abuse. Others my become overly outgoing to try to cover their past.
A child may also become overly alert or observant of his or her environment and certain things or images may trigger them. They could cry, run or freeze, speak incoherently or become very clingy. A child may also show anger towards other children or pets.
The effects of trauma are usually perceived as normal, if they are experienced within the first 30 days after a stressful or dangerous event.
The effects for young children are usually anger outbursts, throwing tantrums, anxiety and fearfulness, clingy, nightmares, sudden behaviour change, bed wetting and difficulty sleeping etc.
If, it proceeds beyond 30 days, it is important to see a professional therapist.
The language used with children to refer to private parts of the body sometimes blur communication.
If a child calls their private parts dudu and an uncle touches it; the child may report that the uncle touched dudu, which is an insect.
Hence, a parent may dismiss it as the uncle touched a cockroach for instance.
It is very important to communicate directly or probe a child's statements to get all the details.
When communicating grief, you need to use sensitive and truthful language. If you lie that a person who is dead has gone somewhere, the child may keep expecting them to return and might not grieve then.
Make sure they understand that the dead person is never coming back but not so bluntly.
Guide the child to talk more than bombarding them with so much information.
The writer is a child psychologist