I've not been to lunch dates or dinner dates since I graduated from campus because what I got from them was...you guessed it, nothing.
They all felt like job interviews—a bunch of questions and answers swinging between two people. All of them ended up with the same result, interest in the person going up in smoke.
The last one I had with a girl I really fancied marked the last time I ever asked anyone out on a lunch or dinner date. I discovered that she just wasn't interested and maybe I was trying too hard to impress her with the series of questions I threw her way to keep her interested.
Long story short I lost interest in the girl.
If you are reading this and still thinking that a lunch or dinner date is a good idea, I have news for you. A dinner date is the second worst after a movie date; at least with the former you get to talk, in the latter you keep quiet for two hours.
Dinner dates are the perfect way to erode interest in each other, that is if you're getting to know someone for the first time. Lunch dates are just as bad, the only advantage is the short time you have before getting back to work.
So there you are seated across from each other for four hours spilling everything about yourselves over a plate of Italian pasta, for example, even declaring your stand on the BBI report. Then the conversation moves from Covid-19 to Sauti Sol cancelling their concert at the eleventh hour to people jumping into the New Year in police cells.
Afterwards, both of you are full and sleep is on your minds; bedroom antics on the first date is not an option. The next morning you try texting her and she doesn't respond...you're careful not to text her too much as she is one of those girls whose fingers hover over the block button 24-7.
You decide to ask another girl out, but after the failed dinner date you want to try something different. By then you already have plans to try GP karting on the new track that opened in a fast-growing mega mall, so you pick up the phone and text or call her and say something like:
"By the way, I'm going to check out this GP karting track that opened just the other day (at this location), you should come."
She agrees. On the material day, it's a tight contest between the two of you for the top spot, with the whole track to yourselves. You beat her once, she beats you the next round and as a tie-breaker...she beats you.
You accept the defeat like a boss because, at the end of the day, the one thing the two of you had was fun.
You grab some ice cream for the two of you and take a stroll through the mall, sharing conversation and checking out shop after shop. At the end of the day, you realise you have had an amazing time and tell yourselves you can't wait for the next one.
Long story short, a dinner date should only be an option after about five or six dates, when you're getting serious. Doing something together like going GP karting or for nature walks among other things on first dates is fun, and fun creates more interest.
Moreover, it offers a girl an opportunity to see you at your natural self, as a guy who likes to go out and explore new places as well as new adventures. I'm not saying dinner dates are a bad first date idea, but you can do better than just interviewing the person you'd want to sire your children with.
Before you ask that girl you like out on a first date, check on what you intend to do first during the weekend then rope her into your plans. Could it be you're going to catch a big Premier League game at a sports restaurant that just opened recently? Are you planning to explore those nature trails that netizens on social media keep talking about? Or are you planning to stay in and cook that delicious meal you've only been seeing on The Food Network channel?
Ladies want to see you at your natural best, they don't like fake personalities...I bear experience to this. Invite her to your plans as a first date and you'll be thrilled at how much fun both of you will have.
Side note: Club and bar dates might also be good, the drinks are cheap. But are you prepared to converse with each other with the music at maximum volume and having to deal with drunk people trying to flirt with your potential girlfriend?
Editor, Viral Tea
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