•We’ve left this burden to our wives or women, yet it’s about family planning, not woman planning as my friend calls it.
•Sit with your spouse. Have candid conversations and make the best decision for your family, as a couple.
Last week I attended the International Conference on Family Planning in Pattaya Thailand.
Since the first ICFP in Kampala, Uganda in 2009, the International Conference on Family Planning (ICFP) has served as a strategic inflexion point for the global reproductive health community, providing a global stage for countries, organizations, and individuals to make important commitments and celebrate achievements as the world’s largest scientific conference on family planning and reproductive health.
I was really excited to receive the invitation and attend the 3-day conference that has become more than a conference.
It has grown into a platform for researchers, advocates, governments and communities; a movement towards achieving access to family planning for all; and a growing community guided by the spirit of partnership, inclusivity, innovation and scientific rigour.
I was invited to speak at the event and to DJ as well. I bet you’re wondering how?
Well, I consider myself an unlikely ally. I am probably three contradictions all wrapped in one: A Christian who is a DJ and openly speaks about family planning and one who has done a vasectomy.
(Ouch!! I know that’s what some men here are thinking. Quite a good number of them have just crossed their legs at the thought of getting a vasectomy)
Here’s why I champion this worthy cause of Family Planning: my beautiful wife and I are blessed with three amazing children.
Right after our last born we were certain that we did not want any more kids.
We talked about what we should do next to prevent having more kids.
But even more than that, I was alive to the fact that my wife had been on hormonal contraceptives for 9 years straight!
Can you imagine popping a pill every day for 365 days then for nine cycles? Those are many pills.
The physical brunt she bore for all those years was significant.
Well, so we started talking about what options we take for Family Planning and how I could be a part of it.
I remember visiting an obstetrician to discuss the family planning options available.
He began the conversation by asking if we were done having babies to which we both gave a resounding Yes.
I remember he turned from talking to my wife and me to just talking to my wife enumerating a long list of family options available to her.
I was a spectator in this conversation.
The options presented to her were all kind of crazy and tough for her.
I could tell you she wasn’t impressed by these options.
When we got home, we discussed it for a few months and I knew what I had to do.
It wasn’t going to be easy. But I was going to take one for the team.
It took a couple of months for me to get there. V. The V word. And not a virgin. But a VASECTOMY.
And I am glad I did it. It was the simplest procedure. I drove myself to the clinic, and sat with the doctor who performed the procedure (he was quite good I must say).
In 30mins, I was in and out of the hospital. I drove myself to the office and then home.
Level of pain from 1-10 with 10 being really painful, was a 2.
It was a game changer for my wife and me. The joy in her and peace of mind, money can’t buy.
We need to have more men take part in family planning conversations.
We’ve left this burden to our wives or women, yet it’s about family planning, not woman planning as my friend calls it.
Sit with your spouse. Have candid conversations and make the best decision for your family, as a couple.
Regarding vasectomy, a lot more needs to be done.
We need to destigmatize and burst the myths around vasectomy. For many men, it’s not easy.
We are careful about our private parts, and we protect them more than anything else (including our heads or our hearts).
A man would rather lose money than have someone mess around with his private parts.
But on a more serious note, FP is important because we need to manage and take good care of the wonderful gift of children, God has blessed us with. Kids are a blessing but they are expensive! They don’t come cheap!
I would like to encourage governments to run campaigns (PR) to educate society about vasectomy.
With it, champion men to actively take part in FP. Then, make the services available in more public hospitals and at affordable costs.
Men taking part in Family planning is #Better4Kenya.
#FPFor All
DJ Moz is a gospel DJ and a family-planning champion