Boxer Conor Benn/XAt the centre of Conor Benn's heavily tattooed torso is a large cross and at the bottom of his stomach he has the words 'Fear God' inked on his skin.
Since childhood, Benn has been a devoted Christian but his commitment to the faith has endured some serious tests.
Benn moved to Mallorca, Spain with his parents and siblings as a young child, spending 12 years there. From the outside his life had all the trappings of luxury but the reality was much different.
From the outside, his life had all the trappings of luxury, but the reality was much different.
"I lived in a beautiful home - a beautiful mansion - and went to private school," Benn told BBC Sport.
"It was very heavily Christian, very religious. School was very extreme and church was very extreme."
"Christmas was blasphemy so we couldn't celebrate it," he added. "Everything was just a lot."
Benn, 29, attended a fundamentalist Christian school, and was told the "world was coming to an end".
His parents had fully signed up to the evangelical life and the experience left Benn with scars that cut far deeper than those he has sustained inside the boxing ring.
Around the age of 12, the school believed Benn was "demon-possessed".
"It was very traumatic," Benn said.
"You were waking up in the morning and not knowing whether the anti-Christ was here.
"As a kid you're easily influenced by people in these positions or power.
"Looking back - because I don't often reflect on it - you think it's pretty evil."
As Benn prepares for a rematch against Chris Eubank Jr on Saturday and attempts to avenge the only defeat on his professional record, he tells BBC Sport about his memories of the church and how he eventually forgave his father, Nigel Benn.
Benn's father, Nigel, is a former two-weight world champion and moved his family away from England for a fresh start.
Nigel was dealing with personal issues after leaving boxing. These included sex addiction and a suicide attempt, and he thought the church would guide him in the right direction.
"At that time, my dad was vulnerable with everything going on in his life," Benn said.
"My dad had gone through things in life that I couldn't understand. I was too young. He had moved out [of the family home] and lived with the pastors for a year."
With the school's influence over his parents, Benn felt isolated and like he had no one to turn to.
"My parents, I can't say necessarily believed the school, but you've got to remember you've got pastors in a position of power that make you feel like maybe there is something wrong," Benn added.
"They had me fooled because I thought there was something wrong with me."
Benn was unable to break free from dark thoughts even when he was back at the family home.
"I was having nightmares, this recurring nightmare, and would wake up petrified," Benn said.
"I was just a kid and shouldn't have been having those dreams or fears."
That unorthodox upbringing saw Benn progress into adulthood feeling "troubled and angry".
Aged 18, Benn and his family moved to Australia and it was only then he began to realise the full impact.
"You are trying to find your identity and who you are as well as being told you are maybe possessed," Benn said.
He held resentment towards his dad but they came together and started to rebuild their relationship after Benn got arrested.
"At 18 I got in trouble in Australia," Benn said.
"I thought 'oh, I need to go home and tell my dad what happened'.
"He gave me a hug and said 'we'll get through this together' and I realised he loved me."
Benn was 21 when he married his wife Victoria and it was about a year later realisation came that he needed help to process his trauma.
He now has two children of his own and remains a Christian.
"I'm heavy in my faith and pray every single day so I'm not letting them take away from what I believe," Benn said.
"I want to find a church that actually worships God and has the base and fundamentals of a Christian."
On Saturday, Benn will be accompanied by his father, who faced Chris Eubank Sr in two iconic and ill-tempered fights in the 1990s, when he takes on Eubank Jr.
"How did we mend our relationship? Just being honest with each other, sitting down together, a lot of tears together - we've cried hand-in-hand and cuddled," Benn said.
"We've broken down and been vulnerable with each other. If I could only tell you how many times we've cried on each other's shoulders.
"It took some time and a lot of therapy for me to forgive.
"Now I look at my dad and think 'you're my hero'. He was always my hero."
When Benn lost on points against Eubank in April, it was a fight that had been two-and-a-half years in the making.
The pair were scheduled to meet in October 2022 but the bout was cancelled after Benn failed a voluntary drugs test, which led to a two-year battle with anti-doping authorities, before his suspension was lifted in November.
Benn has always denied intentionally doping and was supported by his father throughout.
"I couldn't have done it without my dad. We were both sinking together really - we were struggling together," Benn said.
"The amount of times I came home sobbing, and I mean like a little child, like my four-year-old son would to me.
"I would tell my dad that I didn't know if I could make it through and he was there for me."
Benn was villainised by sections of the British public for what they believed to be doping and was jeered when walking to the ring when he faced Eubank.
After losing that bout, Benn received a round of applause as he entered the media room for the post-fight news conference.
It also appears that he is beginning to get the public back on side following that gutsy performance as he hopes to leave that dark chapter behind.
"I fight for [the public] and I want to entertain them - that's a heavy priority for me," Benn said.
"Every time I get in the ring, I give everything I have, every ounce of blood and pour my heart out.
"It took me years and years to understand that I'll never be enough for [the public]. Why? I'm doing my best.
"I'm a kid doing his hardest to be my dad because he's my idol and hero."
