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September 26, 2018

Bound By Duty: Which Way For Me?

BOUND BY DUTY: WHICH WAY FOR ME?
BOUND BY DUTY: WHICH WAY FOR ME?

Jeremy was forced down a career path by his family. Now he believes he needs to break away before he can ‘settle down’.

 

CONTROLLED LIFE, RANDOM WOMEN

It’s a strange time for me in my life. I’m at the point where everyone is expecting me to make a transition into more serious things – a wife, children, a mortgage… Adulthood, in short. Not that I mind all that, it would be good to have that stability instead of all the nights out drinking and trying to score with random women. Thing is, I have a problem with the vehicle that’s supposed to get me there – my job.

In my family, it was always expected that one of the boys will follow in my father’s footsteps. My father is a businessman, and his legacy had to be passed on to someone. I have two older brothers, so I never thought that would fall to me. I watched, though, as both my brothers managed to weasel their way out of the succession and do what they love. When it came to me, my parents weren’t taking no for an answer.

 

CLOCK IN, CLOCK OUT

So I went to university, studied business administration, graduated and started working with my father. Don’t get me wrong – I like the work. Making sure all the books are proper and balanced gives me a sense of fulfillment. My problem is that I don’t love it. I don’t wake up thinking of new ideas to boost the business, new methods to work more efficiently, to innovate. I basically clock in, do my portion, surf the Internet, and clock out. Repeat.

It’s pretty miserable, and now I feel like I’m too far gone to change. I never got the chance to explore, to try, fail, and fail again until I found what my calling was. My life has been planned for me since I was in high school, and I hate it.

 

ONE LAST FIGHT

Now there’s marriage added to the mix. My parents are not so subtly pushing me towards that, and I’m afraid if I don’t find someone soon they might pick someone for me. Imagine spending the rest of your life with someone you didn’t choose, imagine having sex with them, having children with them… That would be unfair to her, unfair to the children, even unfair to me.

That fear might also make me rush into a relationship I shouldn’t be in. I’ve seen so many of my friends end up in difficult situations because of rushing into commitment and sex… I don’t want to end up as a statistic, so I’m fighting it. For seemingly the first time in my life, I’m fighting my parents. I may still have time to find a career that’s exciting and suits me, but this one I’ll never be able to bounce back from.

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