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September 23, 2018

Tips For Surviving The [email protected] Weekend

Frankie's Sports Bar and Grill, Ngong Road
Frankie's Sports Bar and Grill, Ngong Road

The weekend started early courtesy of [email protected] celebrations. We are witnessing this four-day holiday because fifty years ago, we stood our ground and said no to the colonialists who had deprived us of our freedom.

Even as they left, their passion for many things including tea and bread, Range Rover and many other things was left with us. We also retained their passion for football, which is the current religion in town.

You know that something has a religious inclination when a gentleman jumps off the seventh floor of a building because he cannot imagine his favourable Manchester United team losing twice in a row.

With the passing of such a person, I am wondering if we are prepared to deal with such a long weekend since it is a rare occurrence. This column is just in time to give you some tips on how to cope with being away from work for four days. This is how you can spend this amazing time.

 

Transport

Moving around at this time can be a deadly enterprise. Those leaving town for long journeys are traveling on buses driven by folks who have not had enough sleep.

If you think that you are safer in town, it's not any better as you have to cope with drunken drivers who leave the bar at odd hours claiming their cars know the way.

To cope with this menace, you need to be vigilant as you enjoy yourself. If you must drink then take precaution by contracting the services of taxi guys to drive you home. They are quite experienced when it comes to dealing with 'mad drivers'.

If that does not work for you, make use of lodgings in the bar and spend the night there. Should you feel that the evenings are too cold, then you might acquire the services of certified heat merchants who are readily available at the time of need.

The same applies to those who have to travel to distant places. You are advised to tame yourself as there is no difference between the “fundamentals” you have been with and the ones you will find elsewhere.

 

Alcohol

There is a close relationship between transport and alcohol. These are dark days for those who drink in public places because the body mandated to fight against drug abuse is not playing games.

They are visiting all alcohol dens and imposing themselves, even bursting into adult entertainment places deemed to have flouted public decency.

With this being the case, one needs to be careful where they drink. If you must drink in a public place, you must be certain no rules have been flouted in the particular place.

If there is public nudity, bad services, untidy washrooms or even bad fashion you must leave and find a safe place. You do not want to be one of the fellows seen on TV covering their faces with jackets as an energetic anti-alcohol abuse boss in the foreground explains the evils associated with their actions.

It's not just drinking in public places that you should worry about. Even drinking in your own home may not be that safe. We do not know if authorities might come and accuse you of influencing your children negatively.

Drink only when the young ones are in bed and if you must yell and laugh loudly as it is the norm with the drunken, I recommend that you do this via your cell phones

As the evening gets louder, you can send text or WhatsApp messages with the appropriate words, punctuated with exclamation marks, to show you are yelling or laughing loudly.

 

Christmas Vs Nelson Mandela

Many Kenyans are engulfed in a moral dilemma at this time. Christmas is around the corner and this calls for mandatory celebrations marked by cheers and Boney M music from the public broadcaster.

Kenya is also celebrating its 50th year as a republic. Then again,Nelson Mandela has passed on and we must all respect the departed; especially one who is celebrated across the world.

The only way to deal with this dilemma is to celebrate. We need to celebrate the birth of Christ and [email protected] as well as the life of the fallen freedom icon.

These celebrations should be concurrent. If you are in a bar, this is the recommended manner of ordering your rounds, “Leta bia tatu, moja ya Yesu, moja ya [email protected] na moja ya Mandela.” (Bring three beers, one for Jesus, one for [email protected] and one for Mandela.)

With these few tips, I wish you a very good long holiday. If things get out of hand and you cannot make it to work on Monday, do not despair. If you make it on Tuesday or any other day, you can explain to your employer that you were unwell and unfortunately, there was no doctor to attend to you. That is why it took you a bit longer to report to work. We are Nairobi folks after all; taking advantage where we can.

 

Venue Review

Frankie Sports Bar and Grill, The Greenhouse Mall, Ngong Road

Nairobians are known for their passion for sports especially the Barclay's Premier League. As a result, they would go to the extremes to catch their favourite team in action.

If you are in this group of people, then I have to recommend to you a new pub in town at the Greenhouse Mall on Ngong road. It is known as Frankie's Sports Bar. The bar is the second of a franchise, the first is up the road opposite the Nairobi Baptist Church.

I went to this bar on Sunday afternoon, my mission being to watch the Kenya rugby team Shujaa as they played in South Africa Rugby Sevens. The Greenhouse is just by the Adams Arcade and while the design is excellent, it seems to lack in warmth that you would expect in a mall intended for shopping.

This is why I found it odd that on a Sunday in December, this place had few shoppers.The best thing about Frankie's is that even with the few people around the place, it was a beehive of activity.

I saw a large group of people watching games on a large TV just outside the entrance. The crowd on the comfortable chairs were sports fanatics of all ages.

Some were college students while others looked older. Interestingly, the crowd was quite cool despite their notable age differences. I settled on a chair and ordered a cold Tusker which did not come as fast as i anticipated.

It was retailing at Sh200 and considering that we are in 'mad times', the price sounded reasonable but it is not. There was camaraderie at the place as we waited for the Shujaa game.

We were however disappointed when we lost all matches including 50 points to a fiji side. That's not what [email protected] is all about, dear Shujaa. Apart from enjoying Kenya getting drubbed at the rugby, I went to the inner part of the pub and saw a very cool place.

The posters on the wall were of popular sports personalities like Thierry Henry in an Arsenal jersey. The decor was excellent although I realized that there was no visible alternative exit out of the place. This is not ideal should an emergency happen.

 

A quick recap of the venue;

Good

Convenient location, decent service, clean washrooms, cool sport loving crowd, disability friendly, clean washrooms.

Bad

No visible fire exits.

My verdict

A very cool place to watch your favourite sports team strut their stuff.

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