- Though they have the titles of fathers, uncles and grandfathers, the men have little to offer.
- Another generation of men, she noted, has decided to keep off marriage and spends its time loitering in the villages.
Image: ALICE WAITHERA
Karung’e village in Mathioya subcounty is the home of irresponsible men who do not provide for their family.
This has forced wives to take up the mantle of family leadership while their husbands are reduced to observers who spend their days at shopping centres scavenging for cheap alocohol.
Peter Irungu, a village elder, said a large number of men in the area have fallen into the trap of alcoholism which has caused them to neglect their responsibilities.
Though they have the titles of fathers, uncles and grandfathers, Irungu said the men have little to offer as they choose to remain unproductive.
Irungu appealed to the local leadership to help save families from this menace by providing guidance and mentoring the men.
“It is such a shameful thing that we have so many men who are called fathers but have remained shadow figures in their homes yet they have the energy to provide,” he said.
Senior chief Frasiah Njeri confirmed Irungu’s concerns, saying only a few men show up when she organises a baraza.
Local teachers, she said, have also complained that mostly women turn up for parents’ meetings in schools.
Image: ALICE WAITHERA
Njeri, who spoke at Karung’e grounds during a meeting organized by Ahadi Kenya for men on Saturday, said women have joined saccos to provide for their families.
“When schools open, they go to these saccos and take loans to pay school fees. Why are men not being proactive? Why can’t they form their own saccos to support each other?” the senior chief wondered.
In these saccos, Njeri said, women meet and vent which helps them to cope with the stresses they undergo in their homes.
“But men only meet in shopping centres to drink. This is why women live longer,” she added.
Another generation of men, she noted, has decided to keep off marriage and spends its time loitering in the villages.
This has resulted to a reduced number of pupils in early childhood development and education centres in the area.
Those men live with their parents and demand food without helping with any work.
Njeri said it is time elders took up the responsibility of talking to men to emphasize the need for them to be responsible adults.
“Older men who go to drink in the shopping centres set a bad example for their sons who follow in their footsteps. Fathers need to talk to their sons and mentor them while they are sober,” she said.
She raised concerns that some women are now forced to take their sons for circumcision, which is against the community’s culture. Njeri said this is because men have left a gap that has been filled by their wives.
The initiates lack mentors as men flock bars and pay little attention to the boys as they cross over into adulthood.
“We need men to take up their rightful place in the family and the society because without them, things cannot go right. They need to break the norm of being provided for and start being the providers like they should,” she noted.
Image: ALICE WAITHERA
Timothy Mwangi, an elder, said it is unfortunate that men have become so weakened by alcoholism that they are unable to protect or provide for their families.
Mwangi said alcoholism denies men the chance to lead normal lives while causing their families immense stress.
“When I was younger, I used to drink and I can tell you I did not have the strength to fulfil my manly duties. It is our responsibility as elders to point where things go wrong. What will happen when our community is wiped out because of alcohol?” he asked.
Ahadi Kenya CEO Stanley Kamau said he will sponsor a wedding ceremony for 10 youths from the village who choose to get married this year. The wedding ceremony will be held at Karung’e grounds.
But the youths will have to stop their alcoholism to find brides, he told them.
Kamau, who issued hens to the over 300 men, said he will meet them again next year to help them form a group for empowerment.
“Men cannot rely on handouts. There are many things that they can do, including poultry farming, to support their families,” he said.
Kamau condemned traders supplying illicit brews in the area and vowed to work with the administration to flush them out.
The village, he said, needs to be cleaned up for the sake of the future generations.
Kamau urged the men to reject politicians who buy them beer as they seek votes and instead ask for money that they can use to better themselves.