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Tuesday, April 25, 2017

G-Spot: A chance to market Kenyan sorcerers as world leaders in their craft

At the beginning of this year, the US government declassified certain documents from the 1970s, revealing the CIA once used psychic powers to spy on their enemies.

According to the Miami Herald newspaper: “In an operation code-named Grill Flame, half a dozen psychics working inside a dimly lit room in an ancient building in Fort Meade, Maryland, on more than 200 occasions tried to peer through the ether to see where the hostages were being held, how closely they were guarded and the state of their health.

“Officially, the psychics worked for US Army intelligence. But the documents in the CIA database make it clear their efforts were monitored — and supported — by several government intelligence agencies, as well as top commanders at the Pentagon.”

If the story had been about somewhere in Africa, some might say they used sorcery. I prefer to refer to this ability to perceive information hidden from the normal senses through extrasensory perception (ESP) as African Electronics.

I agree with the quote that, “Electronics seem to confirm the age-old African belief that entities can transmit vibrations at a distance, and thus, witchcraft and sorcery are said to employ African electronics.”

Now for many years, crude adverts about the services of practitioners of the dark arts have defaced tree trunks and lamp posts in Nairobi and other urban areas. Often, perhaps because Kenyans are shy to admit that some among us also practise, these ‘electricians’ are said to be from Tanzania.

This leads me to believe that Tanzanian ‘electricians’ are the most potent. However, a recent claim from American far-right radio show host and conspiracy theorist Alexander "Alex" Jones could potentially swing the pendulum in favour of Kenya’s homegrown ‘electricians’.

Claims about the potency of Kenyan ‘electricians’ went viral on social media not so long ago thanks to Jones who, while addressing assertions by President Donald Trump that his predecessor President Barack Obama ordered the wiretapping of Trump Towers, swore that Obama used supernatural means to monitor Trump.

“My sources in the CIA tell me Obama had a team of Kenyan witchdoctors on the payroll who were trying to read Trump’s mind,” said Jones on his show “InfoWars”.

As others attacked Jones for his words, I saw an opportunity for Kenyan practitioners of “African electronics” to finally emerge from the shadows of their Tanzanian counterparts and market themselves as the leaders in their field. After all if the leader of the free world called on their services, forsaking all other means of spying on Trump, they must be world-class and should use this to position themselves as market leaders.

I can imagine walking down Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington DC, in a few years' time, and seeing lamp posts and tree trunks covered with adverts for “Expert in African Electronics from Kenya”. On that day, I’ll know we have arrived.


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