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Monday, July 24, 2017

G-Spot: The day a miracle-peddling charlatan changed my life

False prophets
False prophets

I normally have very low tolerance of miracle merchants and other charlatans who will use every trick in the book and some that aren’t, to get every last cent out of you.

I’m talking about those fraudsters who prey on the desperate and vulnerable.

These parasites thrive on situations where people find themselves in the midst of financial woes. They are drowning in debt, struggling to put food on the table, pay rent, pay for transport to and from work. People who live in fear that every time they leave the house, the landlord might come to throw their things out into the street.

Alternatively or concurrently (if their luck is particularly bad), people whose marriages or relationships are under strain. They suspect infidelity or you may already be heading to the divorce courts and just need a miracle.

Worse yet, they are a slave to an addiction, be it drink, drugs or gambling.

On the day in question, I got home after what had been a particularly rough day. In my letterbox, along with the usual junk mail, was a curious pamphlet from someone claiming to be from East Africa. That piqued my interest immediately.

In part, the pamphlet, which promised to be the answer to all my problems, read like this [all spelling and grammatical errors as received]:

My name is Mama Najiwa, i was born on June 30, 1975, in Yolamo town, Mpemba Island, East Africa. My father is King Ssonkwe Jommo the second and my mother was princess Amiss Victoria now deceased , I was pronounced a traditional healer by king Jessa Ssonkwe of Singoni mountain in 1980 ,When i turned 5 years .This was because my granda father said that i had signs of a great traditional healer. I joined pre _primary and completed grade 12 in 1982 at Prince and Princess K&G international high sch in northern kenya.

the school is meant only for then royal famillies. I joined the university of Buckinghurm shire in Uk and i complete in 2OO with a B,A Culture and Teology. Studing at the above univerty gave me an opportunity to learn more about different peoples nature and bahaviors

If you have tried the rest in the other parts of Western Cape, with no results, come and try the best .on this ,trust me , because this is different .there is a secret . “You will have sex naturally,a permanent change will prevail. Life will just Become better.

CONSULT : Prophet Noor Who is on DUTY every day

{Fortune Teller,Herbalist and Marriage consultant}

This worlds well known GURU with many years experience in Africa ,Indian and Chinese Medicine is back by popular demands...

The drivel continues, but by this point I was laughing so hard, 0I0 could not read any further.

Like my childhood friend, Hynie the Laughing Hyena, I had laughed my troubles away, and all thanks to the magical powers of Mama Najiwa.

I think I could end up being one of those people whose testimony is printed on her pamphlets.

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